weight loss tracker

Thursday, August 25, 2011

Stuck in class

Woah did I re(learn) a basic band lesson today!!

Do. Not. Rush. Eating.

No matter how soft/easy I think a food may be, it can still get stuck if I eat it too fast.

This semester I have 10 minutes between my classes. I rushed out the door this morning with only time for a quick protein shake, so by the time my first class was out, I was RAVENOUS. I had packed a healthy little lunch : 3oz shredded moroccan chicken, some cooked summer squash, and some mushy cooked cauliflower. I knew I didn't have time to safely eat the squash or chicken, but I figured the cauliflower was a safe bet. Oh, no.

I spent most of my 1.5 hour Trig class sliming and in pain. Gross TMI, but I couldn't leave class (I am in WAY over my head and can't miss ANY of the building blocks in this class), so I pretended to drink my water and just slimed into it instead. UGH.

Suffice it to say I WILL be *making* time to make something slightly more substantial to eat on (my) school mornings, and I will include a greek yogurt in case I absolutely have to eat between classes.

This old dog will eventually learn these new tricks, right?? ;)

Tuesday, August 23, 2011

Feeling it again

The motivation and the band both.

I'm still not sure if I damaged myself this summer with the overeating, but I guess time will tell. My best girl, who was banded the same day I was, recently found out that she has what our surgeon is calling a hernia of her stomach, but which sounds like a prolapse from her description. I hope against hope that it can be repaired and she doesn't lose her band. Her progress has been slow, but very good, and she's so very, very close to Onederland!

I would so take her place on this if I could. The band for her has been a great weight loss tool, whereas for me it seems to be a better tool for keeping me from binging too much, but not so much a good losing tool. I *hate* the way it works when it does for me -- by making me terrified of pain rather than satisfied with small portions. LOL

It is what it is, though, and I made this choice.... so I've got to make it work for me and not against me.

Being back in school and having my elder daughter back in school really helps my motivation. The schedule just seems to keep me targeted better. My spouse is out of town for 3 weeks to his first Burning Man excursion. I've been 7 times, and we've both been to the local regional Burn multiple times, but this is his first jaunt to the big Burn in the desert. I hope he's having fun!

Oddly enough, him not being here is making everything run more smoothly for the kids and for me. We get into our own groove pretty easily, and me knowing that I have to keep up with the schedule, cooking, and the house on my own means it all gets done. Our relationship is sort of weird, and one aspect of it being weird is that we're honestly better at getting things done separately than together. He's missed, by this household and the extended households as well, but we'll have to figure out how to keep the works running smoothly when he returns! hehe

My muscles are all sore from my return to exercise, but it's a good sort of pain. I'm only at 3 days/week right now, but I'm working on fitting more into the schedule.

Let's hope I can keep up the new pace and edge my way closer to goal this semester!!

Tuesday, August 16, 2011

Body, forgive me, for I have sinned...

... it has been 4 months since my last confession.

And boy howdy, I definitely didn't treat myself right this summer at all.

I lost my momentum back in May, but hadn't blogged since April, so I should have known it was coming. Around the third week in May, I twisted the heck outta my ankle/foot and even though it recovered by mid-June, I didn't set foot inside the gym again until yesterday.

As I've watched the scale creep ever closer back towards 200, I kept telling myself I needed to get back on track. But never quite managed to do so. Lots of summer treats and no exercise made gaining inevitable.

I made the discovery that my band gets really freakin' tight when I'm stressed out, and when I'm stressed I'm not likely to want to put up with being stuck all the time --- so can we say sliiiiiiiiiiider foods?? *sigh*

I learned exactly how to eat "around" my band, and I got very, very good at it. Gained 16 pounds, though it could be worse. At least the band kept me from binging as badly as I used to do before I got it. I can still binge, but it takes me a while, and my lower stomach does have time to register feeling full before I can consume as much as I could pre-band.

Anyways, it seems that I'm finally coming out of the emotional/mental downward spiral in which I spent the summer. This is good for a variety of reasons, but the one that applies here is that it means I'm more likely to stick with the rules and enforce structure in my life in general. When I'm in this mode, I can focus (good for the upcoming school semester), I have energy for working out, getting our new digs unpacked and set up, and for meal prep -- my kids have suffered this summer from my ennui too.

I'll be back-reading a little bit on your blogs too, though I doubt I'll make it through 4 months of posts. ;)